Don't make out with my wife yet
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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