I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize