the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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