Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap