He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him