Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize