Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
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The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
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sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
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