You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize