your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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