The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
