Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Randomize
