please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize
