SEEEEXXX PLEASE
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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