I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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