I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
