Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
