You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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