what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
