Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
how drunk are you?
Several
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
