puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
It's official drugs can't kill me
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
