my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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