I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
