just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm like, not good at living.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
