just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize