Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
