how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize