i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
