problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
i am craving dick and cupcakes
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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