You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
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