i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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