it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
