Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
