so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
