You know, be my cock's hype man.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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