I need help removing her.
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It's official drugs can't kill me
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
