Tell her she can't have a vagina
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
