just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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