I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize