Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Just high enough for therapy.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
