We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize