So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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