She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
