He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
