Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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