no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
