Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
