How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
