I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
love makes seman taste better
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
