I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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