I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Randomize
