i need an iv and a liver transplant
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
