i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize